Self-rambles

The only reason why I am fine now, is that i'm learning to not expect so much from people anymore. The friendship is not existing purely because of me trying to strike up a conversation and tell people things while the other party just, responds and that's probably about it. It makes me feel that they don't really want to talk to me, so what's the use of initiating right? You don't tell me about your day, about what you're doing and going through, it's fine. You don't need me that much anymore and i'm dealing with it. People are busy with their lives, so am i. People make new friends, so do i. So as to stop myself from giving so much and yet receiving that little, I'll stop. Stop initiating, stop waiting, stop expecting. Because when i do, i'll just be killing myself and you still won't really care.

But when one day you finally realize something is wrong, and it's too late because i'm too used to what i'm doing, numbing myself. Take a look at yourself. At what you've done.

till then,
x